Brand New Batch of Postcard Adventures!

Wanna participate in my Social Experiment? You can read about it (here.) If you email me your name and address I will send you a Vintage DC postcard with a ridiculous adventure recounting an experience that the two of us never had.

Here’s a brand new batch of adventures!



 The Batman guy was here again. He was looking for you. This time he had the full costume on and he even made a “bat belt” out those plastic rings from a six pack of root beer. I told you not to mess with that guy! You need to put those plastic flamingos back in his yard. He was pissed and next time he’s bringing that guy who dresses like Wonder Woman. I can’t have these guys here. Fix This!

Your Pal, Jackie





 I have a problem. The monkey from the pier followed me home, the one with the fez, not the one wearing the Hawaiian shirt and the pink converse shoes.  He’s just sitting on the banister outside my apartment door smoking menthol 100s. Every time I open the door he jumps down and comes after me. My cell is dead, so I’m sending this postcard. Please call Hector to come get his monkey! Tell him I’ll do whatever he wants and to hurry. If my landlord sees this I will be evicted!

 Your Pal, Jackie





So now that training is finally over I guess we can call ourselves Astronauts! I am experiencing two things; the most intense excitement ever imagined and complete horror. In the name of Science we shall overcome our fears and realize our dreams! I can’t wait to feel 0-gravity but I wish we didn’t have to bring all these tarantulas! I guess we get the horrific assignments that nobody else wants cause we’re the rookies.  Oh well, outer space here we come, even if it is with 250 NASA Tarantulas! Somebody has to perform this study or we’ll never know if Dr. Willow’s Theory is valid! See you at lift off!

Your Pal, Jackie





I had to get your address from Barnaby. I hope you’re not avoiding me after what happened at The Ladies Charity Fundraising Brunch. I’m sorry about my behavior but I told you I can’t hold my liquor, not even one mimosa let alone nine. I’ve already apologized to the mayor and the rest of the trusties. They weren’t too angry. Regardless of my nudity I did raise over $9000.00 for the cause and a lot of people thought that my performance was more artistic than inappropriate. So please don’t excommunicate me from The Ladies’ Welfare League. I promise I will behave myself next time.

 Your Pal, Jackie





We are so lucky we made it out of Vincent’s BBQ Party in one piece. He needs to keep that alligator on a leash! I don’t care if it’s a trained pet. When that guy dropped his hotdog on my foot I thought that thing was gonna take my leg off.  Thank God that Mexican Wrestler came to my rescue! By the way there’s a rumor going around that you left with the Luchador. I liked that guy, he was sweet and he drives a yellow Camaro! So bitch’n! Call me with the details!

 Your Pal, Jackie




JasperProfessor Jasper,

I was worried about inconclusive data with your Cute Kitty Serum. I went into your laboratory last night to check on some equations and I thought I figured out the algorithms. I adjusted the serum and administered it to subject A, the kitty named Ugly Phil. I am pleased to say Ugly Phil is indeed cute now and no longer ugly, however there was a defect with the serum and now Phil the kitty is two stories high and weighs as much as 3 elephants. I apologize for my rash decision to work on the experiment without you. Please accept my respectful resignation.

 All the best, Dr. Jackie 



Keep sending in those address and I’ll keep sending out fake adventures!

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